Scribbles...

Xmas Party Time!

2010-12-19T00:01:00.001+08:00

2009-08-05T10:04:00.003+08:00

Came across this story by Jim Dalrymple. Shows you just how COOL iPods really are! Those who buy into the whole status thing really needs to read this!

Just a side note before the story: remember how Apple acknowledges that there is a temperature regulating element that freezes your iPhone when operating temperature exceeds a certain range? This was in response to complains that the latest iPhone 3GS heats up to a point where it becomes uncomfortable for use. Apple blamed it on users who operated the device out in the sun. Hmmm so what's their excuse for exploding iPods? Still the sun i wager. But if the device can explode just by being used in direct sunlight, isn't that call for alarm? Or does Apple wish us to retreat into darkness?

The father of an 11-year-old girl in the U.K. said Apple tried to keep him from speaking about his daughter's iPod after it exploded last month.

Speaking to The Times in the U.K., Ken Stanborough said after he dropped the iPod Touch, it began hissing and started to get hot. As a precaution, he threw the iPod outside and "within 30 seconds there was a pop, a big puff of smoke and it went 10 (feet) in the air," he said.

Apple agreed to give Stanborough a refund, but only if he signed a confidentiality agreement, agreeing not to disclose any information about the incident. Stanborough said he found the letter "appalling" and refused to sign it.

To be fair, letters from companies in situations like this are most likely standard procedure. However, this isn't the first time Apple has been accused of trying to stop people from reporting on faulty iPods.

Reporter Amy Clancy of KIRO-TV in Seattle said it took her more than seven months to get documents from the Consumer Product Safety Commission on iPods that mysteriously burst into flames. She said she had filed a Freedom of Information Act request, but Apple lawyers filed "exemption after exemption" with the commission to stop her from getting the over 800 pages of documents.

Clancy said the documents show 15 "burn and fire-related incidents" that iPod owners blamed on the device.

Apple declined to comment for this story.

Jim Dalrymple has followed Apple and the Mac industry for the last 15 years, first as part of MacCentral and then in various positions at Macworld. A guitar player for 20 years, Jim also writes about the professional audio market, examining the best ways to write and record songs on a Macintosh with Logic Pro and Pro Tools. Jim is a member of the CNET Blog Network and is not an employee of CNET.

Suicide dumps floodlight on protectionist Apple culture

2009-07-23T13:17:00.008+08:00

I read with great sadness how the apparently obsessively secretive corporate culture of Apple Inc. indirectly caused a young old promising Production Manager in a Chinese factory to kill himself due to immense pressure from work regarding a missing prototype of Apple's 4th generation iPhone (4G?).

FYI: The recently launched iPhone 3GS is the 3rd generation.

The factory in question is run by Apple Inc's manufacturing partner Foxconn International, a unit of Taiwan electronics conglomerate Hon Hai. Apparently, Foxconn had a past history of alledged employee neglect in its factory, which also produced an Apple Inc. product, the iPod.

According to Nanfang Daily, Sun Danyong, 25, grew frantic when he discovered 1 of the 16 iPhone generation 4 protoypes under his care was missing. He vented his growing frustration in text messages to his girlfriend and a former classmate, and tried to find the missing device, the Nanfang Daily said. But company officials from Foxconn's security division apparently decided he was lying and raided his home although nothing was found.

Despite this, security chief Gu Qinming found Sun suspicious and summoned him to his office, where Gu got agitated and laid hands on Sun in an apparent attempt to coerce a confession. Sun was also alledged to have been locked away in a room to isolate him in an apparent attempt to psychologically pressure Sun to said confession.

Sun's former classmates further claims that Sun described what happened in an online chat with them as one of the most humiliating experiences of his life. As a result of the avalanch of pressure and cloak of suspision engulfing him, the Yunnan native caved in, and jumped from his 12th floor apartment the day after.

According to Steven Lin, a Chinese blogger and marketer, "most young Chinese guys don’t have friends who are lawyers, so they don’t know how to protect themselves in the legal system. They won’t even look for help from the legal system. They will just endure the pressure, and finally find an extreme way to end all their troubles."

This incident caused a furore when the account was published, triggering investigation both by the police as well as Foxconn. Apple Inc. released a statement stating that "(They) are saddened by the tragic loss of a young employee and (they) are awaiting the results of the investigation into his death. (They) require that (their) suppliers treat all workers with dignity and respect," it added, declining further comment.

The company has previously threatened lawsuits against media and bloggers that try to publish information about its upcoming products, often arguing they obtained the information from employees who violated confidentiality agreements. Apple has traditionally build up hype surrounding forthcoming product releases by enforcing media blackout on said products as well as a slew of savvy teaser ads, designed to mount anticipation. This is why confidentiality is of primary importance to Apple Inc. It also explains why there is tremenous pressure working in partner firms of Apple.

While many may feel this is an over-dramatised event, i beg to differ. A life has been lost through senseless discrimination stemming from a closeted and oppressive corporate culture. Why Apple Inc. consistently partners with a company that has a history of employee neglect amazes me. Their press release also leaves much to be desired; it appears Apple's strategy has always been to disclaim any responsibility and to instead apportion blame on others.

Reports of iPhone 3GS led Apple to state that this is due to users operating the latest gadget in scorching temperatures - in other words, its your fault, not theirs!
Discoloration of that same device? It is due to 3rd-party casing accessories, Apple claims.
Same thing's happening here - "We require that our suppliers treat all workers with dignity and respect." How's that for being responsible?

I honestly believe something needs to be done, both within Foxconn and with Apple's contractual clauses. In Foxconn's case, security have no right to manhandle anyone, much less their company's production manager, when there are no evidence supporting their hypothesis in the first place. Even if Gu did not beat up Sun, Gu himself admitted to grabbing Sun's right shoulder roughly. This is manhandling. Eliminate this type of behaviour from the workplace! If, as security chief, you cannot even contain your anger and lash out at people, i'm afraid this bode ill for that company's security.

Also, Apple might wish to consider mandating some kind of audit check to enure employees of partner firms are not ill-treated by imposing fines, which can only confer benefits to Apple by offering an opportunity to swell its coffers while at the same time generating goodwill.

The many faces of me

2009-07-20T11:58:00.000+08:00

hmmm which one looks better? longish hair or short ones?

Baking @ midnight

2009-07-16T09:41:00.004+08:00

yawnz. really tired today cause i slept at 3am last night. What was i doing? well... baking!!

Wanted to make a really chocolatey Black Forest Cake (黑森林蛋糕/シュヴァルツヴェルダー・キルシュトルテ/Schwarzwälder Kirschtorte). However, in light of the fact that half my office is coughing, i decided it might be better to do just include 1 layer of chocolate cream sanwiched by two light chocolate genoise and covered with fresh cream (with a 38% fat content) encircled by a ring of sponge fingers and smothered in chocolate shavings.

Couldn't find fresh chrries in my fridge last night for deco so i used the only other fruit available - grapes! At least there are loads of cherries in the cake even if you don't see them on top!

Okay. Gotta go - supposed to be rushing report!

Post Birthday Post

2009-07-08T13:21:00.002+08:00

*Big Sigh* Finally got down to blogging about my birthday. Someone told me birthdays are usually week-long affairs and i guess to an extent, it was! Met a couple of people both before and after my birthday for dinners and chat and it was great - except i'm on diet and can't eat as much as i'd like to.

Oh and on the actual day... you'll never guess where i spent it. In the Hospital! Yea!! My mum apparently got a bad case of adominal pain (she did not tell us about it until it got too painful - two days later, and on my birthday!) and we called the ambulance and she was groaning and all. So we got to hospital at noon. And waited to see the doctor. and waited for test results. and waited to see doctor again. and waited. and waited... and... waited. a grand total of 7 hours spent waiting!

The doctor finally saw us and told us my mum needed to be in hospital. And nope, they still couldn't tell us exactly what caused it - that will come later after the ward doctor has seen her. So we got down to waiting. Again. finally got up to ward. Man. i was so tired coz i slept at 6am the previous day and got woken up at 11!

Thank God my mum's fine now - they removed a gall stone which wascausing the pain in an procedure that was quite simple - they merely inserted the apparatus down the throat and operated. Cool huh? Been going down to hospital everyday after work. yawnz. dead tired. Hopefully it'll be over soon.

See ya!

Monday blues

2009-06-29T15:05:00.002+08:00

Man, this is some depressing day. Went for wedding dinner last night but did not really enjoy myself coz (1) i was down with flu (H1N1 alert!!) & (2) some super sarcastic person was antagonising me the whole night. Just wanted to go through the entire affair quietly but nope, sorry, it was one joke after another, at my expense. Sigh. I hope this streak of XXX goes away soon coz i really liked XXX and wish XXX will just get over this whole bitching business.

Talking about THE FLU, Singapore reported another 124 cases on Sunday, bringing total number to over 500. And that's Sunday.... I'm sure the numbers will go up again after tallying Monday's headcount. Gosh. Thank god i don't have fever or i'll be hurled to CDC!

Gotta go - boss coming in!

Puffy Eyes

2009-06-02T15:26:00.002+08:00

Am writing this with my eyelids almost shut. Oops. Not a good thing. I wonder why i'm so sleepy sometimes. This has not happend to me in a long time. Late nights on flickering computers. Someone give me an Asprian!

Okay. I've been here for a month. As in my new office. Am i learning? You bet! BUT! Am i contributing? I don't think so. Right now i'm just a handsome vase for people to admire. I'm looking forward to the day i'll finally be able to prove myself useful. (I hope).

Was chatting with this fellow on the Net and we met last Saturday night. However, it seems that i was too much of a disappointment. No SMS, no email. Not even an MSN message when i log on. Hmmm. i mean, before we met, it was "when are we gonna meet?!" everytime he sees me online. Now? Its ME who messages him. I'm kinda scared that i'm turning into an outcast whom everyone lines up to hate. sigh.

Oops. Sorry. This was supposed to be a happy blog, not a sad one. =) On to happier things - i'm officially broke. Yeah. Selling off my camera too. Coz too broke. Now how can that be happy? Coz it makes one see who one's friends really are. It is easy to laugh and make merry when the sun shines. But its when the rains come that you really see who's in your merry little band. There will, no doubt be mass desertion when the first fat glistening raindrop falls. But it's always nice to see the few familiar faces grinning at you through hair wet with rain and declare "Let's rock on!". That's what true friends are.

Now, who's with me?!

Bitch Fits by the resident B

2009-05-29T00:27:00.003+08:00

Okay. I know this is kinda like a record - two posts in one night! BUT! i really need to get this off my chest!

See appended chronology:

23:35pm : I came home at eleven, the corridor light was on, assumed it was left for someone else and went to my room. Know why i assumed that? Cause its just me - plain old me, without an achievement to my name. Who would wanna leave lights on for me? Besides i don't go all melodramatic like some people. Who would do that for me right?

00:10am : Got a nasty tummyache and went into the loo. Cue entry of Her Majesty. She proceeded to shriek: "Why didn't you turn off the lights when you come in?" Next she turned to mum and continues: "told you not to leave the lights on!" What is her ***** problem?! She was happily typing on her computer last night when i got home and the HALL, FOYER & CORRIDOR LIGHTS were all on - every single one! Talk about preaching! This B has no sense of shame!

All hail Her Majesty! I say good ridance! Everytime she needs help she comes to me. What am i? Your BUTLER? Not anymore man. If you want WAR, you will get it! From now on, no more Mr Nice Guy. Problem with your internet connection (She once mistook the delay in connecting to mean that i must have done something to sabotage her wireless connection... when i was using the SAME wireless connection to surf. HUH?!) - don't look for me!

Stayed out late, got smashed and forgot your keys? None of my problem. Don't you dare ask for help you ungrateful worm! That's it! over! Finito!

H1N1 has breached our defenses!!

2009-05-29T00:18:00.002+08:00

WOW. What a header. The one thing that caught my attention out of the myriad headlines on news. So. It is true - just like the Ministers warned.

I guess its kinda evil to be rejoicing but i can't help but feel happy this has happened. I mean, look at the number of people rushing to cancel tours to countries where there are infections. Typically Kiasu. Typically Singaporean. "Oh i don't wanna go to the USA now. Gimmebackmymoney!!!"

Yawnz. So what now b*tches? Wanna migrate to the moon? After all, if you are afraid of getting infected in a country that is a million times the size of Red Dot Singapore, what 's to stem your fear now that it has reached our shores? Did you know Singapore is one of the most densely populated place on earth? We have over 1,500 people squeesed into a square kilometre. Shouldn't you wear full protective gears?

OOOOoooohhhh if only i can just watch their faces fall! Woopee!!!

Sleepy Day @ Work

2009-05-26T12:40:00.003+08:00

Yawnz. this is the sixteenth tiem i'm yawning at work. It's so frequent that i've taken to wearing a mask just to conceal them! Am staring at the computer screen trying to appear engaging but my eyes just refused to cooperate. Traitors!

Anyone free to entertain me just buzz me ok? SAVE ME!!! Mwahahahaha!!

in addition to the below

2009-04-29T01:07:00.003+08:00

Oops. i don't normally write so much in 1 night! gosh. Where do i start? Oh yes! Josie Lau! This is taken from the press release by DBS regarding their employee one Josie Lau, who became AWARE's president.

The bank takes pride in the fact that many DBS employees pursue their interests and passion outside work, and are involved with various community/charity/volunteer organisations in their personal capacity. These employees had sought and obtained prior approval to do so, in accordance with the Bank's staff code of conduct. Approval is granted on a case-by-case basis, depending on the demands of the proposed external appointment as well as the job responsibilities that the individual holds in the bank.
Josie informed the bank of her appointment as AWARE Exco member on 13 April, over 2 weeks after she was appointed on 28 March. She had not sought prior approval for this appointment and thereby breached the staff code of conduct. Nevertheless, DBS made a concession and agreed to support her involvement as Exco member.
Early this week, Josie broached the subject of her intent to run for President of AWARE. We reviewed her request and subsequently informed her that while the Bank continues to support her involvement in AWARE, we could not support her intent to run for President, given the demands associated with the top post of a leading advocacy group in Singapore. Banks worldwide are facing very challenging times and her role as VP in the credit card space today is even more challenging, given the environment we are in.
Every year, all employees are required to acknowledge that they will abide by the bank’s policies. We are disappointed that Josie knowingly disregarded DBS’ staff code of conduct twice. Such attitude is not one that DBS, or any other organisation, can condone in a leader. We are now reviewing the matter internally.
-- DBS spokesperson, 17 April 2009.

So. Josie Lau already made the decision to run for presidency as early as mid april. Yet in an Interview on Channel News Asia 2 days after this press release was made, Ms Josie Lau literally slapped herself silly with an outright lie.

“There were 5 of us, we went around the table and none wanted to take up the position (of President). I was the last woman standing. And I felt that I had to pick up the baton, to run and to continue to lead this organisation that has been marred in controversies in the last one, two weeks.”

Does this not give the impression that she never intended to run for presidency but that circumstances forced her to do so? Did she forgot her talk with her supervisors early that week?

Makes you wonder if any of it were real...

I'm so tired of these people who ride the moral high horses. What's so good about your brand of religion anyway?

anyone caught unAWARE by the recent flimshams?

2009-04-29T00:22:00.002+08:00

I must admit, i am a very lazy person. See, i cannot even remember to blog about my first day at work. Okay, admittedly there was nothing to blog about. BUT!! AWARE! The recent issues surrounding AWARE's power tussle really got me itching to write.

A Little History:

quoted from www.we-are-aware.sg
On March 28, AWARE was taken over by a group of newcomers who had only recently joined the organisation. 102 people turned up for AWARE's annual general meeting (AGM), which had been relatively less well-attended in the past. 80 of these attendants had only recently joined AWARE between January and March 2009.

When the election of office bearers began, almost every position was challenged by a member of this group. 9 out of 12 of the executive committee memberships went to newcomers, who were voted in by wide majorities.

Claire Nazar nominated by out-going President, Constance Singam, was the only one voted in unopposed. She resigned the Presidency 11 days into office. Josie Lau was subsequently appointed by the new Exco to take her place.

There are wide-ranging suspicions that this "leadership grab" has been orchestrated by women seeking to use the name and the resources of a well-respected institution to further their own agenda.

These concerns have been expressed not only by onlookers, but by older members of Aware.

The new group at the AGM felt that it was not relevant to make known their “religion and views on homosexuality”.

Except for Jenica Chua (and old AWARE members, Caris Lim and Chew I-Jin) other members of the new Exco joined AWARE only in the last five months; none of them has served in AWARE committees nor participated in AWARE initiatives as volunteers.

The new Exco has terminated all the current heads of the AWARE sub-committees, including Braema Mathi, Chairperson of AWARE's CEDAW Committee (CEDAW stands for Convention for the Elimination of all forms of Discrimination Against Women, an international bill of rights for women adopted by the UN).

The new Exco has kept ex-President, Constance Singam out of Exco meetings, which is unconstitutional.
Constance Singam and Claire Nazar have resigned from the new Exco on the grounds that their advice and direction have been totally disregarded by members of the new Exco.

The new president, Josie Lau and 5 other Exco members belong to the same church, Church of Our Saviour. Given this, it is very likely, in our view, that they have acted in concert to take over AWARE. We do not know why as they have refused to disclose their reasons to either members of AWARE or to the press and this makes us even more worried. They, or persons whom they have been associated with, have written homophobic letters to the press. While that is their personal conviction to which they are entitled, we do not want AWARE to be made into a vehicle for any hidden agenda.

Josie Lau, was in charge of the DBS Charity Drive in support of Focus On The Family, US-based Christian organisation that is opposed to abortion and equal rights for sexual minorities. This created a controversy last year which was well-documented.

160 members, including former AWARE committee members and founder members, petitioned for an extraordinary general meeting to consider a vote of no confidence in the New Exco on the basis that the New Exco has not acted and is not acting in the best interest of AWARE; does not appreciate or share the values of AWARE and does not have the requisite experience of carrying out AWARE's work or is otherwise inadequate to further AWARE's objectives. An EGM will be held on 2 May 2009.

What Happened Since:

April 23 - Mother Superior Thio emerged from the shadows. This effectively runs counter to their claims that no one instigated them since the new guard acknowledges her as their "feminist mentor". If they needed a mentor in feminism, what are they doing on the exco of AWARE - a feminist movement?! Also, Mother Superior claims "... She(sic) go round Singapore teaching, counselling. So when all these problems about Comprehensive Sex Education came forth, then she(sic) started thinking: Hey, parents, you better know what’s happening, you better know what’s happening… She(sic) talked to parents, (she) said, you better do something about this, otherwise your daughter will come back and say, “Mum, I want to marry my girlfriend” or your son will say, “Dad, I want to marry my boyfriend.”

April 25 - "The Straits Times : Too Diversified or Too Focused; which is it?" article appears, throwing further doubts on the exco's agenda, which, hitherto appears to be nothing more than a confused mambo jumbo.

Oh and they fired the centre manager, accusing her of logging the president out of the system. Funny. SHE said the case was logged but the silly president did not know how to access her email. Oooo.

April 27 - It has been reported that the church in question - Church Of Our Saviour, supports their congregation joining AWARE to sway more votes towards what a Pastor termed "...a necessity to ensure that the nation does not cross the line drawn by God". Yet official spokesman for the church claims the church does not have a policy of engaging in secular affairs. Right. So what does the email by your pastors mean? An altar call?!

MOE also rebutted Mother Superior, challenging her to substantiate her claims that schools allow talks promoting homosexual lifestyle to take place.

All in all, it was quite a show. Now, comrades, stand up for freedom and say an emphatic NO to any religion who tries to play the role of moral vigilantes and force their religion on us!

A meet up with an old friend...

2009-04-19T01:32:00.002+08:00

I went out with an old friend (A) cause he saw me online and asked if i'd like to meet. Said he just broke up and was feeling very down.

Okay - sure! i'll play aunt agony, plan something that'll help to get his mind off the matter, at least for a while.

Went to NParks website, downloaded a couple of maps, print them and set off. Met at Tampines 1 (did you guys note how crowded it was in there?!), and took a train to Buena Vista in order to reach Kent Ridge Park. I found out just how bad it was when A started telling me about tarot cards and spells and astrology, and how he plans to use them to win back his (ex)lover.

erm. okay. Wasn't sure if using spells counts as fairplay but if he's not harming anyone, it's cool.

Alight at the station, took bus service number 200 and almost ended up at the wrong stop since the place marker (its in the wilderness after all - no buildings!) was mouldy and overgrown with weeds. Found the entrace up Kent Ridge Park. The regret piles on almost immediately. Man! the slope is steep! Make that S.T.E.E.P. !! I was smirking at the nice bespectacled chap who looked like a Doctor (or at least a Houseman) walking slower than my grandma, until i started to pant. ARGH!! The deceptive slope took more effort than we both thought! Bet the Doctor (i know there's a possibility that he ain't one but i don't care - he looks like one!) is smirking now!

Anyway we trudged up the slope, walked the little patch of green, went downslope on some broadwalk, found Reflections @ Bukit Chandu (Chandu means opium/drugs in bahasa malayu), found a map, decided we were at the wrong spot, and walked back up broadwalk. Tada!! found the sign that says "Southern Ridges"!! Went down hill (again!) and found ourselves in the very beautiful Hort Park! We saw daisies (real daisies!!), roses and all manner of flowers and took tons of pictures before setting foot on our true destination - the famed bridges and canopy walks of Telok Blangah and Faber hills.

More climbing (i know there aint steps but since we are going uphill, we must be climbing!) and a lot of squeezing later (what the.. oh its saturday - of course everyone's there), we found a rather large garden, complete with landscpaed terraces in gradually expanding concentric circles lined in aged balustrade along the style of the grand early Rennaissance period. The only thing missing from this expansive garden was an equally grand palace - only a sad gazebo grace the top terrace. (Just read that this "Terrace Gardens" was part of the Alkaff Mansion!!)

Further on, we found the now abandoned Alkaff Mansion. OMG!! its lovely even in it's dilapidated state! Snapped some pictures and continued on to the Henderson Waves. Man! It's beautiful against the darkening sky - like some golden shimmery stairway to Heaven!Finished our trip with a walk down Marang Trail (which remains unlight - had to rely on the torches i brought) taking us to the base of Mount Faber. Went for dinner at Vivocity - where we were promptly mistaken for Indonesian tourists.

Time was 8:30. Decided to go for the Songs Of The Sea musical fountain show at Siloso Beach in Sentosa - crazy huh? Fed myself a giant sized Malibu Dream from Coffee Bean and a cake before heading back. Laughed at near non-stop screening of "Just For Laughs" on the bus ride home. Bought some more water and sat at the playground near my home. And that was where i heard the shocking news.

My friend's been tested positive. For HIV!! OMG. Now i understand why he is so keen on winning back his (ex)lover. i mean, he has nothing else. So, even though i do not condone his using spells to cause his Ex to break up with the current lover and return to him, i couldn't blame him. Just kept telling him to reconsider and that it doesn't do him any good if he wins the body but not the soul. Nothing goes in as expected.

I really don't know what to say. And after much pressing, he did tell me that if all his attempts should fail, he might as well die as there is nothing without Jaz. Oh dear... I honestly don't know what to say. I am violently against the idea of imposing one's will on others but at the same time can't let him die like that! Big headache.. Please, pray for A. And for Jaz, who's been avoiding his calls. I sincerely hope that a resolution will be found soon..

Operation Tarty

2009-01-20T17:39:00.002+08:00

I'm writing this while waiting for my pineapple tarts to finish baking.. This is the 3rd batch. Man its hard work. Thank god for the strong monsoon winds - they keep my kitchen (and me) cool!

Made about 70 tarts. final 20 in the oven. They look flaky though.. Okay so iate and realised they were

2009-01-18T22:30:00.002+08:00

Just done cleaning up. Made a batch of shortcrust for my pineapple tarts. But i figured i should cut the butter. And the dough was much easier to work with. Hmm hopefully it wouldn't turn out biscuit-like. Am done with the preparation. Gonna bake tomorrow!!

Today's my day off! Was planning to go shop for some lavender sachets to place underneath the pillow but i couldn't find any in Bugis. Think i have to go to Takashimaya. Yawnz. Damn tired. Gonna go sleep now. Nitez. zzz. zzzzZZZZZ...

Happy CNY... Kinda

2009-01-17T18:10:00.003+08:00

Brand new year. New hopes, new dreams, new salary (hopefully). Definitely need a new life. Goodbye dreary days, hello sunshine!

Starting a new year with resolutions isn't the most productive but damn if i'll let the "experts" tell me how to live my life!! I want to join a marathon this year, see some digits in front of the every present zeroes, and get myself some nice sweet girlfriend. hwahwahwa!

Been thinking of the novel i've been meaning to complete, started ages ago but somehow, after the first few pages, it just stopped. Anyone want to offer some fresh ideas? I'm stuck at the boy-goes-out-to-battle-evil part. What happens next? Boy meets girl? Boy meets lost love? Boy discovers lost legacy? argh. Argh! ARGH!!

Okay think the computer's frying my brains. Gotta go lie down or something. No, wait, that's for old ladies. I'll.. go something.. Like Now..

2008-11-24T21:35:00.001+08:00

GREETINGS!

Nat forgot to log out from his blog account... so here I am..

ta da da da da~

Aha..

2008-08-03T23:28:00.002+08:00

Came across this and i just had to post it - itz that good!

UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND

A friend of mine send to me this adorable and funny letters written by a desperate housewife to an IT Support to seek for help on how to solve some software technical problems experienced by her. It's a cute joke and I had a good laugh. Hope that you enjoy reading it too ^_^

***

Dear IT Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
slow down in the overall performance, particularly in the flower, gifts and jewellery applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs,
such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programs such as Formula One 5.0, NBA 3.0 and World Cup 2.0.

And now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply
crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,

Desperate Housewife

.
.
.
.

Reply:

Dear Desperate Housewife,

First keep in mind:

Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Try entering the command C:\ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0.

If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Late Night Teh Tarik 6.1.

Late Night 6.1 is a very bad program that will create SnoringLoudly.wav files.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.

You might consider additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Tasty Food 3.0 and Tongkat Ali 6.9.

Good Luck,

IT Support
.

back from hiatus 2.0...

2008-08-03T22:50:00.002+08:00

Yep. I'm back from hiatus 2.0. Or was it 3.0? Maybe it was 4.0... No couldn't be. 5.0? Ahh... ANYWAY! I'M BACK!! I promise to update more often (i know i said the same thing last time round but this time's different)!! I will be revamping the layout soon 'cause i've always loved neutral colors.

Anyway, just wanted to report that i've been down with flu for the past week or so. Actually, i've had flu since 2 weeks ago. And it just refused to go away! Can you believe that? What audacity! How completely barbaric and rude! I meant to continue my exercise regime which was to run 6km every alternate day but the silly pesky flu stopped all that. Come on! Please. Would you please go away?

And its NATAS again! Or was, since today's the last day and i've knocked off work. The crowd, the excitement, the endless talking, the sales hitting the roof (the ONLY time i ever hit my sales targets)... Thank god it's over man! Just hope that there will not be a repeat of last year's fiasco - flight overbookings and cancellations. These words always seem to trigger diva mode, with ear-shattering pitches that jump right off the scales way beyond the upper registers. I'm constantly amazed at how many new notes people can invent when they get all pissed with you.

Okay, guess the cat's out of the bag. Yep i'm still the bitchy (i'm sorry but there's no masculine verb for being bitchy) soulful guy with lots of energy to boot. Will need to terminate here 'cause i really need to sleep. So take care and hopefully i'll remember to post tomorrow. (",)

...

2007-05-28T19:46:00.000+08:00

Today marks the date that Cookie Yang finally gave up the struggle and passed on... It's been great having you around, Cookie, though at times i really feel tempted to spray water on you for being so naughty! I guess i should have known Cookie was falling ill when he started fighting with Dough every time Dough comes near him. By the time i discovered, it was too late... It has been a very tiring week... Sorry for the extremely short post but i really don't feel like saying much... Dearest Cookie, you will e missed by Dough and I...

2007-05-18T22:06:00.000+08:00

Yawnz. Had a pretty hectic day. Went for bible studies in the morning. Was told that God is selfish as He wants us to glorify Him, not ourselves. WTH?? lol anyway walked around Tampines abit and then came home tired and sleepy and was about to climb onto bed for a much-needed nap when my mobile rang. It was Shawn - my army camp buddy. Shucks. Forgot we were supposed to meet. Bye bye nice warm cozy bed. See you later... =p

Met Shawn at Nat Lib @ Bedok. He wanted to discuss the rental of stall at Nat Lib @ Bugis for selling stuff. We decided on cookies coz thatz my forte!! LOL. Then he started buggering me about match.com - wow... that guy is desperate!! We discussed about the pros and cons before finally deciding that it is best to wait and do more research first. I mean, how many ppl actually find true love on a matchmaking website?!

Came back home and realised no one was in. had fun on my computer until 12am. =p Boring day really.. I need a job..

rainy days are here again...

2007-05-17T22:39:00.000+08:00

It's the rainy season again. Personally i feel that raining is okay if you are indoors and able to get some sleep but it's NOT okay when you are out cycling, with no shelter in sight. Which was what happened today!! Ahhhh!! was supposed to cycle to Sentosa with my friend but since it started raining, plan was canceled. We went to Great World City instead to window shop. Great World City appears to be really quiet which is great since i hate crowds. And no. I am not claustrophobic. Or whatever -phobic illness that is. I simply enjoy having my own space. And also because i think i offend people whenever i am around them so its probably best for everyone i stay alone. =p

Oh yah. Nisa smsed to ask me about the recipe i sent her. It takes alot of trial and error before i hit on the right formula and i think it can still be improved. The basic measurements are there but i usually add more of a particular ingredient if i'm in the mood for it, like more chocolate or more milk depending on how moist i want the cake. So i'm afraid poor Nisa is gonna get very confused. I hope her cake turns out right though. And the whipped cream is a killer! Too much beating and the fats separate from the liquid resulting in a disgusting grainy mess. Too little and the cream slides off your cake. ARGH!! And you need to be very careful when adding powdered flavouring into the cream. The powder stiffens the cream so you may end up overbeating the cream and still get clumps of congealed powder! Ewww!!

Okay time for an announcement!! TADA!! I succeeded in making Tan Tan! Steam Egg Pudding! Hong Kong style!! Made two! I ate 1 straight off the stove and left the other in the refrigerator. Yummy!! It's pale yellow and not too whobbly. I'll probably make more next time, with HL milk since i like the vanilla taste. Okay gonna go sleep le. Gotta wake up early tomorrow. And i still want to be a doctor! So fight!!

mahjong!! pong!! chi!! hu le!!

2007-05-16T23:48:00.000+08:00

Lazy mid-week weds - went for interview in the morning but did not really like the place so i guess i'm going to look for another. Meanwhile, after chatting with a friend of mine, i rediscovered what it was i wanted all along... To be a doctor!! And join Doctor Without Borders!! that was and still is my ambition. That's why i have decided to retake my A levels. Anyone good in Biology and Chemistry?? I hope to be able to get into med school. Even if it (touch wood) kills me.

Anyway, in the afternoon i joined Lirong, Vina and Elaine for several rounds of mahjong. But i kept losing!! Thankfully no money was involved. Elaine and Lirong won so many times i got dizzy just trying to count how many. BUT!! after Vina left, i started winning. Okay it was only a modest win of 3 rounds out of maybe 20?? It's a game after all. BUT!! winning is fun!! mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

Gotta go. My eyes are getting very painful. Must be the eye infection... ZZZzzzzz

blogger problem identified

2007-05-14T19:39:00.000+08:00

Hey guys. To all who might have been experiencing problems with creating new posts because of a very jumbled-looking page when you click on the create post link, here's a simple solution as formulated by some helpful ppl. The original link i got the solution from is located here - http://hongjun.blogspot.com/2007/05/singnet-is-causing-problems-to-blogger.html

the solution is rather simple - simply insert a 2 after "www" in the address bar and the proper page should load. Thank you!

bye bye melancholy, hello sunshine!

2007-05-14T19:11:00.000+08:00

got up early today. Okay so maybe 10am isn't early to some but to me that's early. Gave a call to Baby Ken to piss him into waking up and made myself breakfast. Fried omelette with melted cheese and juicy luncheon meat. Yummy!! Was in bliss until i opened my wallet and discovered i don't have any money!! Shucks! SMS-ed everyone going for the Sentosa outing later to secure much needed funds. Oops!

Anyway Sentosa was fun! We took the Sentosa Express monorail into the island at a cost of $3!! Is that cheap or what?? Took lots of pictures, made silly faces, cracked tons of lame jokes. It was really nice chilling out with friends!! Kevin arrived at Sentosa with girlfriend and dog in tow and all of us proceeded to Palawan Beach for some picture-taking on the very creaky suspension bridge spanning the lagoon linking a tiny inlet to the beach.

subsequently, the group split into two, with doggy-fearing Sandhya and Elaine going off to explore the wonders of tropical Sentosa while us guys chill out at the beach. Except Baby's idea of chilling out at the beach involves lathering copious amount of tanning lotion and baking in the hot sun. Natter. I decided to bail and went looking for the gals. Ended up taking more silly pictures and cracking jokes. Fun! Finally came back home tired but glad i enjoyed myself. Too bad we were in a hurry and was thus unable to catch Sentosa at night when the lights come on. ahhh...

happy again

2007-05-13T19:31:00.000+08:00

woke up with a horrible backache. i am guessing it is a gift from acting macho running down 8 flight of steps with a luggage that is 2/3 of me in height. Went to church, prayed, sang some praises and promptly fell asleep. Okay, so i didn't but i was struggling to keep my eyes open. Not that the sermon was uninspired - on the contrary it was awesome! This lovely British lady from Hong Kong came over with her team of Cantonese-speaking peeps and was talking about ministering with the poor. Of course that in itself isn't very interesting since no one likes to be reminded of his/her social responsibilities but she peppered it with a brand of humor that is just so... British.

Okay so after that, i came home to rest my poor back. I think it was already healing but i'm plain lazy so i slept. For 6 hours! Decided i need to do something about the really weird structure of my blog. All that white space!! Blame it on Web Productions (a module i did in school) but i just can't stand staring at so much emptiness. And it's white! So i browsed a couple of blogs that are being nominated for blog awards. Or have the awards been handed out? Never mind. I came across miss Karen Cheng's blog and i am so impressed with her blog that i started reading the archives!! And i found her entries very funny to say the least! it's like, you can almost imagine her expression as the events unfold! Like when she was at a baby massage class and she ran out of things to say to her baby Callum, then realizes the lady next to her was gossiping! About the other women in the class! To her baby! I can a visualize her expression of aghast! by the way her blog's at http://www.karencheng.com.au/ It's very interesting!!

Oh yes, it's Mother's Day. I am broke and am unable to get a gift for my mummy. And anyway we had a disagreement this morning. At 5:30am! All because she saw my sis at the car park alone and berated me for not helping her load the luggage at the car park. Big Sigh.

Day full of depressing messages

2007-05-12T01:28:00.000+08:00

Today, or rather, Friday 11/04/07, was arguably the most depressing day this year... first off, i learn that cheng hoon, the wife of one of our pastors for whom my cell group has been praying, past away after a long struggle with cancer. It was very sad news as only the night before, i received news that her condition was stable. It thus came as a complete surprise that she had succumbed. I fervently pray that cancer patients everywhere will receive comfort and support from family and friends as they fight with the disease. This episode also made me realize how fragile life is. One can be alive and well yet deteriorate rapidly and died within the space of hours. It is frightening how a life can be snuffed out as easily as a flickering flame extinguished in a sudden gust of wind.

The second thing that made me sad arose from a "fight" i had with my mum - she suddenly decided that i must not go to university but instead work so as not to be a liability. I felt like i was kicked in the stomach. I guess what stunned me was that, when i discussed with my aunt about further studies, i stated that i would like to get a degree so as to improve my resume and secure a better job and earn better wage. the only thing was that it turned out the degree takes 3 years instead of one, which was what i told my aunt.

Guess better do a brief retelling of what had transpired.

My auntie had kindly agreed to sponsor my tertiary education, calling it a "scholarship" although, after some miscommunication and a nasty traumatic phone call with open threats from her daughter, i decided that this is spiraling out of hand and asked if perhaps she should withdraw her support since she obviously wasn't thrilled with the idea anymore and even offered to pay her back the sum i intended to loan from her - a hefty $40,000 for the higher diploma and university fees as well as allowance.

Two weeks later, she emailed me to say that her daughter did a spreadsheet for me and using front-end, add-on interest rate of 3%, the final sum returned will be a even heftier $76,000, paid over a ten year period. She then decided that i should get the higher diploma first - "get your main course before you think of desserts" becomes her favorite phrase. More trouble arose when she decides that i misunderstood her after all and she did not want me to get allowance but to work and support myself. Okay... i thought when we discussed i clearly heard her say concentrate on studies and don't think about work or anything. So we compromised. I'll just borrow $7k plus for the higher diploma and then get my dessert after graduating.

Another miscommunication occurs when she called up the school and found out that for some students, the installment plan is available in two payments - once in June and once in September. She once more proceeded to scold me for not doing my homework well as this effectively lowers the effective interest rate. Of course, part of it stems from the fact that i told her when quizzed that the rate is a little high (i was intimidated by her anger and she predictably exploded possibly because she felt i did not understand the value of money, which made me even more terrified). The truth was that i was afraid i'll irritate her and was trying to give her a neutral answer so as to placate her since in my email to her the day before i specifically wrote "very high interest rate" but she was not satisfied. It later turned out she obtained the wrong info as the months quoted to her was for foreign students. I could have said what she accused me of doing - not verifying details, but i did not as it is not in me to demean people.

By this stage i was very stressed but worse were to come. All these weeks of emails and my aunt still have not made clear her intent whether or not she intends to go by the installment plan or the lump sum plan despite my repeat request for her to enlighten me as to her choice in every email i sent her. I may not have given her the effective interest rates but i gave her the payment amount for both installment and lump sum as well as the payment schedule for each plan. Thus i was very confused since her emails became increasingly more antagonistic. Also, I was rapidly developing fear of her and my cousin so much so that i took to avoiding any family functions that put me in their path. Yet i received stiff displeasure from my mum as my aunt told her she was sponsoring me by using money she set aside for my mother's "pension" in an act of sisterly love. My mum obviously thought i was ungrateful. Really quite shocked. My sis helped temper my mum's anger but the damaged was already done. The relationship between me and my mother disintegrated and my fear of my aunt and cousin simultaneously ballooned. That was when i recalled what my friend warned me about - that i should not blindly accept what people offer as there are terms attached and I'll regret should i accept.

Finally, i got the cheque from my aunt and proceeded to pay the school fees (she decided on a lump sum). Again some bad happened. By this time i was really numbed so when i found out that the payee was written incorrectly (they recently underwent a name change and the administrator did not realize he gave me the wrong info). I called my aunt and immediately past the phone to the administrator after briefly telling her what's wrong. I guess the administrator sensed my very apparent distress given i was about to cry so he offered to personally go down to my auntie's place to get the cheque replaced. Hours later, m y aunt called and asked in a very sarcastic manner my "secret" for getting the administrator to drop his work and dance to my tune running my errant to correct my mistake. When i told her it was his mistake and he felt the need to correct it she said "is that so?" in a manner that spoke volumes and abruptly hung up. Once again i felt the urge to just.. just kill myself for being such a useless wimp that everyone hates and who screws up everything.

okay so that is basically what happened in concise detail although a lot more distressing emails and conversations ensued. After all that drama i'd have thought i'll be able to get myself enrolled in a degree program in a local university. Of course i failed to take into account the finance of my family. My mum evidently felt i was liability for long enough and proceeded to instruct me that she wants me to work rather than go into university and she even said she had discussed with my aunt and that was what my aunt originally intended. HUH?? What happened to dessert after main course?? Of course to argue will only set off another chain of events to eclipse the previous traumatic happenings. I just told her i am really confused by their continuous changing of stance and retreated to my room, my emotions all raging loose within me. Once again i felt like i should not have been alive.

It's not just these things that keep happening to me. It's that i feel that my mum prefers my sister as she is more capable and where she'll smile and cuddle my sis and tell my aunties and granny how tough it is not to be able to enjoy holidaying at the places she fly to, she'll run to my aunt and complain about me. When i'm sick, my mum usually says it's nothing serious at all yet when my sis coughs or sneezes my mum immediately becomes very concerned. Also, my mum keeps attempting to justify whatever she gives my sis - like buying laptop for her (and when i got mine, she kept saying how mine is better than my sis like it's a sin that i should DARE to want better things than my sis), sending her to Australia to study (when she wouldn't even support my local university education if i get in), tasting the cakes my sis baked and refusing to eat anything i baked even though its basically the same recipe... I'm rather sad that she shows so much concern over my sister's enjoyment at WORK yet exhibit no pleasure when i told her I scored 4 distinctions, 1 high distinction and 3 credits, even after explaining to her in terms of A+, A and B's what these scoring meant. In the end even my grandma did not know of my achievement but only that of my sister's flight destination and the horrors of her job. I am speechless and very much disappointed but deep down i still love her and i pray fervently for her health in church every week, adding to that prayer, hopes of reconciliation. I am not blaming anyone for whatever happened though it appears that i am. I hate myself more than anyone can imagine, if only they knew. I have always felt that its me at fault and people cannot help but react to me in a manner to display their disgust...

Okay enough. The last thing is of course that NTU finally replied via email to my application. My application has been thoroughly reviewed but unfortunately they have to reject me due to the record number of applicants blah blah blah.

O. M. G.

I never expected this hope of mine to be dashed after all that fight. To be so crushed after fighting for being able to study in a local university... it's too much... I was so moody when my classmates all registered for Monash and i did not dare to in case something bad happened. Of course i couldn't after what my mum said about no taking bank loans in case i defaulted and she had to mortgage her flat to save my sorry ass. I am devastated. Still am.

Thus when my friends started talking about monash and class timetables (they registered), i just felt so low that i wanted to shut myself off from everyone. I did not dare utter to anyone but my spirit is crushed and wounded so badly by all these events. I told my church friend i feel like i do not deserve anything, even God's love and grace. It is not that i don't long for it. I just don't see any hope anymore. Time and again, things i embark on failed. At every key point, i make choices that turn out horribly wrong and people around me are tried past their ability to endure. I don't know why everything i do turns out cursed and ill-fated. No relationships endured; no friends remain for long without straining their patience and hospitality; no workplace could stand having me for long... the list is long indeed... I know it is wrong to do so but time and again i find myself wanting all these emotional hurts and pain to go away, to let me live or even die... I really have no strength to fight. I am a small man, made tiny by my humongous fear and neurosis, my low self-esteem, weak willpower and inability to connect with anyone...

I guess this posting turned out longer than anyone ever intended to read... wish i could find something cheerful and funky to write about but my depression engulfs me and i feel unable to do anything but pour out my pent up frustration and bitter disappointments... God bless...

happy new year!!

2007-02-22T22:59:00.000+08:00

gong xi gong xi!! today's the 5th day of lunar new year and i went out with my classmates for visits! 1st stop was my place - brought lots of food out for my friends but they only ate a little.. sigh. Led them all on a tour of my place. The general consensus was that my floors are very clean heehee!! Then we went over to Elaine's house, which was only 1 bus stop away.

Her house is HUGE!! and she's got a gu zhen!! she must be very cultured right? lol!! we ate more at her place, possibly coz her mummy's in and we feel paiseh since she bought the food specially for the muslim girls Lina & Nisa. Anyway her house is very open in concept - the kitchen has no door!! its an executive flat so that explains the size. wow. so much room for just 3 people!!

Next stop is at Sembawang - Lirong's house. Her place is really festive!! Even the corridor outside her flat is decorated!! and there were so many new year plants in full bloom!! its like walking into a chinese manor in ancient times!! lol. We did the tour again at her place and i found myself profoundly ashamed... Her brother's room (he's reading Bio in NUS) is so neat!! and he's got "The Art of War" in bamboo form!! awesome!! We also played 2 rounds of marjong. erm i won the first round heehee!! anyway. it was a very tiring but happuy day for me. gong xi!! me gona sleep le.. nitezzzzzZZZZZZZZ

Debate aka public spectacle

2007-02-12T22:13:00.001+08:00

Today's the day of the debate... Been a long and stressful weekend. It began with a very horrible Weds in which our lecturer decided to hold a debate. Then, as class ends, she had a eureka and announced she wants to make it a public affair.

The next day, she got us to rehearse the debate in front of her. Thank God I'm only an extra - i thought... Fat chance. A decided he don't want to do it so the lecturer got me to come in, on the pretext of listening in to the debate. WTF! excuse my emotions but even now i am still so arrrrgggghhhh about it!! I CANNOT do public debates!! Even in class presentations, those shrewd and observant enough will notice that when i present it always sounds forced or too fast. That's cause i am not good with public speaking. i simply become a nervous wreak! And more importantly, i become very emotional and disturbed to the point of being unruly and even violent... That is a side of me i really hate but i can't help it. I'm bad at confrontations and no matter what people say, argument is an argument. I'll lose it...

Okay i guess I'd better come clean... I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, which is a form of neurosis whereby i see things in only black and white and am rigid and inflexible. I also tend to have unstable relationships, engage in suicide acts and generally act like a loser. sigh... i was on medication to control my emotions but i felt i didn't want to be addicted to the drugs so i stopped. Besides the drugs make me very groggy and how on earth can anyone function that way? So i stopped seeing the doctor. My family didn't like me to see the doctor anyway because they think I'm fooling around... yet I have never felt more in need of the drugs than on Thursday...

It was disaster. My control of the emotions just slipped. Badly. I kept gesturing wildly and blustering in frustration. I must have scared the daylights out of my classmates but i was so irrational than that nothing registers except that i have been made scapegoat and worse - in public debate, the one thing i swore I'll never do after that disgraceful incident... It's so distressing i don't even want to mention it here. Suffice to say i cracked. Elaine and Lirong were than roped in to help. From the way my lecturer kept going on about the debate it is clear that she wants our team to win, even swapping members to ensure everyone in the team is good. Too bad she did not realise that i turn into an ultra stresspot in debates...

To cut the story short, i continued to help with the debate team's preparations, even typing out the first draft of the 1st speaker's speech and printing out case studies. I'm really sorry i cannot do anything more but i really feel just totally zonked by the whole affair. i do not appreciate being forced into something when no one else is around to be the victim. I mean cummon! Why is it always me who's elected to front presentations and stuff? How irresponsible is that?!

I am just glad its over but some ugly stuff have escaped from my Pandora's Box and i guess they'll never go back in now... God... even now i feel so ashamed and angry with myself. For losing control; for being such a wimp, for being a weakling who cannot escape from his demons... Wait. See? i think only of escape. I don't even want to fight. I'm pathetic... Oh God...

big sigh...

2007-02-08T01:41:00.000+08:00

School was a bore today (yeasturday??) except... We get to do group work again... oh goody. *pukes* Did i mention how much i hate groupwork?! I mean cummon! Why do we always have to have groupwork during the last 15mins of class? And i honestly dunno where my lecturer gets all her brilliant ideas for projectwork from!? For once i'd like class to end with the lecturer summing up what we covered... sigh

2nd horror of the day came at around 1830, while i was on my way to meet a friend at vivocity. Apparently my lecturer managed to convince the management to sit in on our debate as judges... Great... Oh and it is now a public event held at thefoyer... WOW!! arrrr i hate it when ppl orgle at me... okie not at me but all the same i hate being stared at... =(

Itz twice now that she made us put up a public performance IN FRONT OF the management. I mean what are we? exhibits A, B & C? sigh... Oh well.. ganbette nei...! yawnz. i really dun wana sound so sulky but i keep sighing becoz of al these things that happen!! haiz.. opps!

oh no...

2007-02-06T11:43:00.000+08:00

i just realised my pay will not be credited into my acct this month because my company claimed that the conversion from full-time to part-time requires a 1-month lagtime. thus for this chinese new year i'm penniless!! sigh.. what bad timing. even my commission from when i was working fulltime (Dec 06) is delayed. wtf!! how can they do this to me? don't they have any idea of what they are doing? i need the money!!

Yawnz...

2007-02-02T04:50:00.000+08:00

*big yawn* i'm really tired. The past 20 hours have been a whirlwind of activity... My day started normally enough - woke up on thursday morning, 0800, prepared all my stuff, printed out the brochures, posters and postcards for clippings in my PR folio. By 9 i was on the bus going to the mrt. Then, i received an sms from my lecturer saying that she's having high fever and thus classes for the day are cancelled and instructed me and kenny to disseminate the info to others in class. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Everyone just started smsing me and flooding me with questions lol.

Anyway apparently Lirong, Sandhya and Sharlini were all in class aready and nisa was also on the way so they decided to go to the library at woodlands. Me, i waited for FZ at cityhall but it was changed to kallang so off i go! In the end we went home and i was so looking forward to sleeping and generally being a pig but i decided to go online and chat. Found myself a cycling buddy (Alex) so we decided to cycle!! i cycled up to Tampines JC to meet him (the bus stop NOT inside the JC) and we then cycled up to Changi. Spent 15 mins waiting at the jetty for the ferry to bring us over to Ubin but we finally tire of waiting coz the operator din wana start the ferry when itz not at full capacity. Pah!

We found a better way to spend our day then going to misely old ubin. we cycled on the brand new coastal broadwalk!! the scenery was great!! we took pictures of the large rocks looming out of the water and even clambered on some to enjoy the view, pretending to be great voyerers of old! well... more like monkeys but.. LETZ MOVE ON!! heehee

Oh yah we stoped by this restaurant by the sea where the entire building was tilted on the right corner, sloping precariously down towards the sea. it was freaky just looking at the lopsided building! imagine u were dining and the floor gave way... *shudders* Next to the restaurant was a magnificent grand staircase, with elegant balstral and sweeping arcades leading... Nowhere!! LOl how silly is that? it leads to a wall and then abruptly stops! I think it is the most silly sight i've ever seen!!

We continued back to the village at changi for a break and meal and then proceeded to east coast via the airport perimeter, cycling past the tanah merah country club and finally reached the park, keeping an average speed of 23km/h as we were on a vehicular road. Man i thought the road never ends!! it stretches on... and on... and on... and on... and on... and on... and on... AND ON...!!! rest was at coffee bean with latte and carrot cake with yummy cream cheese frosting!! a tad sweet but we found 6 strands of sliced carrots!! hooray!!

Next stop was tanjong rhu as Alex wanted to see the place. By the time we got there it was 8. We sat around the riverfront in front of the Indoor Stadium and chatted for a while, before deciding to continue on to Vivocity via Esplanade, Clarke and Robertson Quay, Beo Cresent, Lower Delta and finally Telok Blangah, arriving at Vivocity at 10pm. Was looking for a place to take a break but we din manage to find it at vivo so Alex suggested going over to Sentosa!! We cycled along the causeway bridge and din even pay for a ticket!! heehee

Anyway we cycled tru the gardens and fountain terrace, moaning at itz eminent demise and went up past the Merlion and on to Palawan Beach. Bought some noodles and Fan Choy and had our dinner at the Koufu foodcourt by the beach. Went over the rickety bridge to explore "the southern-most point of Asian Continent, climbed the towers but both were occupied at the top deck by cudding couples and over-protective boyfriends who stare at us to make us leave. Pah! while there, we saw laser lights over at the other end of the beach and cycled over to investigate. Turns out they were testing the new Musical Fountain built on the water out at sea!! The whole island really feels like a polished tropical resort... even the restrooms look like hotel suites!!

Finally ended our tour and cycled back to mainland. It was almost 1am!! gosh! After encountering more smooching couples, we decided to make a trip down to chinatown before going back. We cycled past some cute retro housing apartments and arrived at chinatown for a cup of teh (tatz tea) and roti john (french toast). This lady sitting across from us asked if she can join us and Alex firmly replied negaTORY! She seems quite disappointed hmmm... oh well i guess tat means no cute guys to keep her company!! the crowd got a bit rowdy and drunk so we opt to takeaway. cycled further down to the food street and ate there, chatting abit before proceeding to ang siang hill for a quick trip to the loo. the whole place is so beautiful!! lush tropical plants cascade down artfully terraced slopes and vines creep down spiraling stairs of wood.. itz like a resort!! finally we are too tired and decided to cycle home. reached home around 4, tired but happy... heehee good night!!

Itz me

2007-01-31T21:44:00.000+08:00

same old me again. i feel so kiddy!! i love ballons, i love lollipops, and i love clowning around making faces at babies n small kids!! i love to laugh and i oso like to hug big cuddly items (a.k.a. Fengzhi's bag)!!! aaaaarrrrhhhhhhhhh why am i such a baby? i wana grow up!! i wana njoy "man" things!! sigh..

okie. get ting back to reality, i had a really good day today!! i hang out with my frens in school and we all ate at New York New York, this restaurant at citylink mall. we all got to try the candy floss machine n it was so funny!! FZ went first and she was really excited her candy floss came out nice. but of coz tatz coz the waitress helped her made it! But Alicia was even more funny!! She dropped her stick into the machine n so the kind waitress got her another! mwahahahaha!! MY candy floss was the best!! it was the biggest!! and i received compliments for it... aaaawwwwww!!! okie me gonna go out le. add more later!!

Blackie!

2006-01-25T10:18:00.000+08:00

juz made a blackforest cake yesterday for yet another fren... really glad people like my cakes!! here are some photos of the finished product. think my decorating skills are improving!!

The cake is decorated with sifted cocoa powder and rich chocolate cream. Arranged cherries on top and sifted snow powder aka icing sugar on it.

looked a little like grapes huh?

tada!!!

2006-01-20T18:34:00.000+08:00

Side view of cake. the base is decorated with chopped chocolate.

Delivered my mango cake to my fren. the topping slipped off a little though... itz tangy creamy mango mousse sandwiched between 2 pieces of yellow buttery cake covered with more mango mousse and topped with shiny mango glaze. Sigh... still very sucky @ decorating cakes...

Mango Mash!

2006-01-20T01:11:00.000+08:00

hi! am waiting for my cake to cool before decorating - rushing to complete before 11am as it for a fren's daughter. Mango Mousse!! havent tried that before... hope it turns out ok... will post pic when done.. take care!!

Baking Bonanza

2006-01-16T16:43:00.000+08:00

Hi eveyone! Juz got back to blogging so i'm posting the pics of the log cakes i made for my frenz in dec 05. *Not for the faint-hearted - pls do not puke k?

The first 2kg logcake i made on 24th dec.

The5kg cake i made for my office peepz... itz a lot bigger than the pic seem to imply... trust me!

Snow covered log no.2- i think i overdid the snow effect in my enthusiasm!!

Er... think tis looks marginally better... itz log no.2. somehow i din beat the cream as long as the first one... the cream is kinda softer...

all three logs are made with chocolate swiss rolls filled with butter cream n then topped with whipped (very) chocolatey cream! mayb i'll do a blackforest one this year!

Sweet Romance

2006-01-16T16:34:00.000+08:00

Baked a double-heart shaped chocolate fudge cake for my fren's bday cum anni.

The Cake before my overdose of cream destroyed it... lol

Tada!! The finished product - oh dear it looks more like a pyramid than a heart huh?! Erm looks a bit ugly too... Anyone wana teach me how to decorate a cake properly?!

Shackles of melancholy

2005-07-31T20:11:00.000+08:00

I've been down with flu this past week. It finally cleared up this morning. Went out with a friend and was confronted with an ugly scene. My whole body went rigid with apprehension when he told me someone he knew told him i was posting something controversial and, shall we say, perversed in nature on an internet website. I maintained it was not me and he appeared to have accepted that. Yet moments later, at home, he sms-ed me and told me to go to the website in question. i knew then that he did not believed me. I deign it unneccessary to reply. Then later, because we were supposed to meet in the evening and it was fast approaching 7, i called him and receieved a shock. He asked me again about the website posting and after i denied having anything to do with it, he cracked. He felt that i was lying to him.. about almost everything.

Alarm bells went ringing in my head as he proceeded to tell me off. This is not happening! i told myself. We are supposed to be close friends! I felt an inevitability to the whole episode. It was like the friendship is drawing inexorably to an end. I kept very quiet as he talked, trying to contain my emotions. Most would not appreciate why i feel this emotional. Perheps it is because i value friendships greatly and, as i've so few friends, i'm not in any position to lightly dismiss friendships.

To sum it up, i cried and made a fool of myself. I guess i still have a lot of growing up to do. I behaved childishly, wailing and sobbing like someone's dead. In a way, it was. Death of a friendship. Thankfully, we cleared up our misunderstanding. Yet it left me chilled. How is it that being such close friends, the friendship still came so close to an end over a misunderstanding? Am i such an unworthy friend that i can be lightly dismissed as redundant? Ingenue. Guess that's me.

2005-07-30T16:30:00.000+08:00

Dear all, below is a letter i came across on a website - www.yasg.com. I felt it was very inspiring and piognant so i'm posting it.

"To all loved ones:

I am writing this letter because the disease I am fighting could perhaps take me sooner than expected. This is a gift, as I can leave my feelings and insights with all of you to carry on throughout out the rest of your lives on this planet. Hopefully this letter will not have to be distributed for another 70 years or so, but I feel blessed with the opportunity to share what I have learned up to this point in my life.

Firstly, I want you to know how blessed I feel to have had contact on earth with each and every one of you. There is a reason we have all met at one point or another. Perhaps it was something as simple as passing on a smile or a laugh on a bad day or help with a major life decision. It was meant to be and I hope I will always stay in your heart.

Through my fight with this disease I have learned a great deal. Most importantly I want to share the insight that we are spirits living in physical shells. Regardless of what effects your physical body keep in mind your spirit thrives within you. Be mindful of this, you'll be surprised how far it will take you.

Experiences and memory are worth more than any material posession. As I look through my material posessions I find difficulty in equating material goods with the lives I have come into contact with. Life is about the experiences, emotions, memories and the love we share. This is not goodbye. Allow my spirit and our memories to remain within. I am thankful for the time we have known one another.

God Bless,

Love Scott"

A Reflection... v.II

2005-07-21T18:29:00.000+08:00

My journey through the ravaged landscape of melancholic depression took a turn for the better early this year. I was involved in an accident. While crossing the sliproad into the Pan-Island Expressway, a SUV sped towards me upon seeing me. It didn't matter that i was already on the road with my bicycle, nor did it matter that it was a zebra crossing and i had the right of way!

The horror of seeing impending danger coming hurling towards you and being powerless to prevent it really hits you in your guts. My whole body went numb with fright and i felt a chill run down my spine. Thankfully, the driver pulled his brakes in time. However, the taxi behind did not.. Tires screamed as the taxi-driver belatedly tried to defy inertia. A loud crash followed and the SUV propelled forward, grazing my legs. I have no idea what possessed me to calmly pick up my bicycle and ride off, as if the accident had not happened. all the time i was pedalling, my legs, and indeed my whole body, trembled like a wobbling jelly.

The accident caused a perceptible change in my thinking. Of course occassionally i still felt depressed. Some things cannot be erased by a mere accident. However i started to react positively to criticisms and even in a crisis, i could keep a cool head and not go into spasms or hyperventilate. It was really refreshing!! As time went on, i became more confident and i started to engage myself in outdoor activities that challenged me physically and mentally such as rapelling and climbing rope courses.

I guess what i want to say is this - no matter how alone you may feel, no matter how difficult the odds, don't give in to despair and melancholy. you will be amazed at the resillence of the human spirit and at the power of thinking positively. please do not alienate yourself from others and shut yourself off to the world. Do not forget that when you build these "walls" to protect yourself, ultimately, you seal yourself in and become trapped with all that pent-up emotions!!

A Reflection... v.I

2005-07-20T12:50:00.000+08:00

back from a very long hiatus. i am now counting the days left to ORD... ahhhh finally, i can dump my army greens and exchange them for civilian clothing!! my two years in the SAF has been quite a bizarre and, at times, traumatic experience. i've had my fair share of tears and laughter, anger and envy. there were times when i was suicidal (especially during my first few months in the Army) yet there were also times when i felt that i was happy and enjoying myself.

I've been suffering from depression since i was 10, being a victim of physical abuse. My first hyperventilation episode was in Secondary school. I was facing pressure and suddenly, my body just went into spasms. i was breathing very hard and my muscles were all cramming up. i was in so much pain i thought i was gonna die! breathing was a chore and as my body became more spasmodic, the Civil Defence paramedics appeared. So... i did not get to meet my Redeemer that day.

For those of you who suffer from depression, let me just say that i really understand how you guys feel, being unable to breakaway from a seemingly unendding cycle of overwhelming sadness and self-loath. it's not that i didn't want to be happy. it was just that everytime i tried to be positive, something bad happens and i sink back into negativities. Whereever i go, i felt that i wasn't wanted, like i was an obnoxious guest who had overstayed his welcome...

the same thing happened when i went into the Army... i frequently hyperventilated and i had numerous medical appointments with my psychologist. i could feel that i was wearing people's patience thin yet i couldn't stop myself. When i commited a mistake and was lamblasted by my unit's Resident Bitch, i become frustrated and even suicidal... it was a really horrible time for me.

joi chua!!

2004-10-24T22:10:00.000+08:00

woke up late today. just in time for lunch. mwahahaha! yea. had some dumpling noodle though the dumplings din seem very fresh. oh well. will let u know if i got stuck in the toilet.

been online all day. juz discovered a new starlet called JOI CHUA or CAI CHUN JIE! really sweet looking n she sounds sweet too!! frm wad i heard, her album's been at the top of the RIAS chart for 6 weeks!! wow!! not bad for a new face.. gonna buy her album!! her songs r nice!! really soothing songs with lotsa flute n other chinese instuments!! GO GET IT NOW!!!

i have one minor complaint though. Have you guys seen the trailer advertisements on TV plugging her album?! The one where they show a series of MTVs for her various songs with the song 'Pei Wo Kan Ri Chu' playing in thge background?

Are those MTVs low budget or what?! Because from what i can see,all the new MTVs seem to be showing her running in some wasteland in Tuas surrounded by waist length wild lalang and grass with various assorted jungle vegetation.

In fact,it looked like some kind of army exercise area to me where soldiers have to hack through with parangs(actually i think it's Pulau Ubin and iI don't think i'm wrong). How Joi can pretend to be idyllic and happy in a jungle with wild vegetation standing at almost her height is beyond me. Somemore,she wasn't wearing jungle fatiques or anything like that. Instead she's wearing this open and flowy dress exposing her delicate arms and legs to the grass and mosquitoes. Wah kaoz, i bet she was itching to death druing the entire shoot. Can't they find a better location?! She looked like she was doing a tourist promotional video for a nature reserve or something!! man!!